Navin once told us that all contradictions are solved at the apex of love. Incomprehensible actions can only be understood through the lens of giving, receiving, or lacking love. I thought to use this piece to perhaps share some contractions of love that I’m still trying to understand.
Love increases in approaching pain
There are no accidents in life. Every situation has been specifically crafted by the Lord’s energy to aid our growth and best facilitate our devotion. Krishna has arranged for us to be situated within a particular geography, family and community. Whilst we may long to have instead been born nearer to an alternate locality (did someone say Chowpatty?), we’re in a situation that’s been specifically crafted to force us to learn that which has yet to be understood. Yet the more we keep running away from our problems, particularly within relationships with others, the more these problems will keep popping up despite varying, seemingly opposing, situations.
Bhakti Tirtha Swami frequently speaks of becoming “love-finders” as opposed to “fault-finders”. When someone interacts with us in an attacking manner, a spiritualist sees this behaviour as a call for love, a call for belonging and shelter. When a person exhibits negative emotions towards us, they feel as though the love we are receiving is actually meant for them. Particularly if we see the same situation playing out in our lives time and time again, it’s a sign that we’ve yet to learn from that lesson and the cycle will repeat itself until we do. Therefore in times of receiving pain from others, rather than abandonment of that person or situation, it’s an opportunity for us to become an intuitive servant. It’s an opportunity to take on the position of a true leader: one whose greatest responsibility is giving love. A leader who isn’t continually offering love, or being a medium through which divine love can be channelled, is nothing more than a hindrance. Each decision we make must be carefully crafted to increase the love of those around us, no matter how painful.
Love increases in sharing
This is one that I struggle with for it seemingly contradicts traditional logic. The essence of the economic problem is unlimited wants but limited resources. There is no resource that increases the more it is distributed. This causes an ungenerous mentality of mine; I avoid fully giving myself or my understanding to individuals for fear of being usurped. Yet in doing so, I act in a manner opposed to the very essence of Chaitanya’s existence.
luṭiyā, khāiyā, diyā, bhāṇḍāra ujāḍe
āścarya bhāṇḍāra, prema śata-guṇa bāḍe
Although the members of the Pañca-tattva plundered the storehouse of love of Godhead and ate and distributed its contents, there was no scarcity, for this wonderful storehouse is so complete that as the love is distributed, the supply increases hundreds of times.
Such is the beauty of our tradition: the more we’re selfless in our offering of love, the more we carry and share the grace of Chaitanya, the more we ourselves feel deeply nourished, satisfied, and loved. I’m often particularly miserly with sharing of knowledge that I’ve learned for feeling the desire to maintain philosophical supremacy over others. Ironically, this is exactly what the smarta Brahmanas think, desiring to maintain and order their position over others. The Smartas were, and still are, a cause for Hindus to leave their faith. And if not inspired by the highest principle, we understand that the more we share, the more we retain! So purely from a physical perspective, we know this principle to hold up.
Love increases in separation
Though a topic way beyond my level of comprehension, this is, again, a principle that isn’t exclusive to the Bhakti tradition. “Absence makes the heart grow fonder”, the age-old saying goes. Indeed the famous verse of the Bhagavatam 10.14.8 mentions both patience in separation coupled with a continued steadfast devotion to ensure Sri Krishna becomes our “rightful claim”. Of course, the Lord isn’t something to be intensely achieved but gracefully received. Interestingly, though, there exists a continuous trend of the Lord forcing his devotees to be apart from Him in order to further intensify their devotion.
Sri Ramacandra left his beloved home and kingdom for 14 years, breaking the hearts of Ayodhya’s residents. Sri Krishna leaves Vrindavan for Dwarka forcing the gopis practically into a state of insanity. Sriman Mahaprabhu leaves Navadwip for Puri, crushing his mother, young wife and friends. Yes, they celebrated when Nimai Pandit became a devotee, but the pain that ensued after was anguishing for sure. Heartbreak, a curse in our day-to-day realm, appears to be a unique gift of the Lord in transcendent relations. The purpose of this heartbreak caused by the Lord, it seems, is to strengthen it upon being rebuilt.
And again, let’s not forget the internal reasons for Mahaprabhu’s advent. His desire to understand the love of Srimati Radharani is best experienced in a mood of separation. This is a crucial reason why the Lord selects Puri as his base: Mahaprabhu is the Lord himself, in the perspective of Radharani, in separation from Krishna, and has continual vision and play with Jagannath, also Krishna, yet in the mood of intense separation from Radharani and Vraja. Their internal mood combines and creates an eruption of emotion, only shown to the few who were able to be part of the inner circle of the Lord.
Love as a topic is so far beyond my understanding that I feel ashamed to write any thoughts about it. Love in the physical sense is always tinged with selfishness. Yet hopefully by striving to see the Lord’s love in each situation, attempting to share it in whatever capacity I’m gifted, and adopting a mentality of a patient receiver, I can one day be a true vessel of selflessness.
